Singled Out

Singled Out - Washington Post

Throughout human history, the motivation and behavior of men has been dictated, in large part, by the competitiveness in attracting the women they desire. This drive reaches all the way back, at least 7,000 years, to our innate desire to procreate, which insures the continuation of the species.

In times when women are in short supply, the competition among men can reach fierce heights. Inasmuch as men have traditionally offered women security, material goods, and status, in return for their attention, those same men have been motivated to advance themselves along with society, in this pursuit.

In times like today, with respect to Blacks in America, where women significantly outnumber men and have taken greater responsibility for their own well-being, the dynamic between the two has been upset.

The study of the myriad of influencers to this interaction could certainly support many doctoral studies and fill many books, but the conclusion is the same. The supply-demand scenario, however it occurs, must gain more balance. Black women must seek and become more available to a larger set of males in order to thwart the negative 'captive' dynamic that is at play.

With respect to the behavior where Black men date multiple Black women, unwilling to commit to a single woman, this will continue or get worse, unless the availability for this behavior diminishes. And 'guilting' Black men from this behavior will never be effective. The short-term nature of guilt only barely works when constantly reapplied, relative to laws of God, and there is no commandment about dating one woman at a time.

Black women, like other women, must consider and pursue attentions beyond their own group. In doing so, they will not only challenge the imbalance and gain greater control over how they are treated, but also realize their under-estimated attractiveness to the world.

James C. Collier

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